I didn't think it was possible, but professional golfers have figured out how.  The SportDork spent last weekend at a bachelor party in Las Vegas, but in between losing blackjack hands and eleven dollar cocktails I was unfortunately able to catch final round action at the Masters.  What a disgrace.  Trevor Immelman shoots a three-over seventy five on the final day of a major and wins it?  The top seven finishers were a grand total of fourteen over on Sunday, and not a single one posted a score below par - not even "the greatest golfer of all time", Mr. Tiger Woods, who would have been in a playoff if he could have figured out a way to shoot a three-under sixty-nine on Sunday.  And please don't be sucked in by the cry of "difficult wind conditions."  Difficult wind conditions don't cause guys to start throwing up all over themselves on the final day of a major and missing putts from every conceivable distance.  No, I'm afraid that kind of choking doesn't stem from weather-related issues.  It stems from ball-related issues, and I'm talking about the ones in their pants, not in their bags.  The PGA Tour has evolved into a giant choke-fest, with guys regularly crumbling down the stretch of the majors, and it's growing a little tiresome.  Tiger is the only player on tour who doesn't soil himself when he's on top of the leader board going into Sunday, but why should he when he's surrounded by a bunch of country-club stiffs who spend Sundays trying to get their breathing under control?  Let's face it - when the greatest adversity you've ever experienced is an over-cooked tenderloin at the club, you're probably going to have a tough time pulling it together in front of millions of people on the final Sunday of a major.  Speaking of pulling it together, here's a clip of Brandt Snedeker weeping like a little girl after his round on Sunday.  Stick around for the ending, when the SkySports broadcaster laughs at him and then follows it with a very astute observation.  Another reason I loved my year in England. 
http://ballhype.com/video/sky_sports_having_a_laugh_at_a_crying_brandt_snedeker/

And Tiger's not even beyond reproach in this discussion.  It's true that Tiger has shown himself to have considerably greater mental fortitude than the rest of the softies on tour, but how much mental fortitude do you need when you know that if you have the lead going into Sunday, all you have to do is go out and shoot par, and you'll likely be hoisting the trophy at the end of the day?  Every one of his major victories has come when he led the tournament going into Sunday, and while that speaks to his ability to maintain a lead and not wilt under pressure, I'm starting to wonder how much pressure he's really feeling when he's got a collection of mental midgets "chasing" him.  Sunday was his chance to bank his first Major title by coming from behind on the final day, and the rest of the field was doing everything in its power to clear the way for him, but even he spent the day missing putts that you'd expect the greatest player in the world to make on the final day of the Masters. 

To put the quality of today's PGA Tour into perspective, I ask you to consider this:  At the 1977 British Open at Turnberry in Scotland, Jack Nicklaus and Tom Watson were both one shot out of the lead after two rounds, and were paired for the third round on Saturday.  Both players shot 65s on Saturday, which put them three shots up on the rest of the field.  They were then once again paired for the final round.  On Sunday, Nicklaus shot a 66 AND LOST THE TOURNAMENT.  That's right.  A final round 66 wasn't enough to win the tournament, because Watson shot a 65.  And oh, by the way, both players birdied the eighteenth.  Nicklaus sank a fifty-foot putt to force Watson to make his three-foot birdie putt for the win, which, of course, he did. 

I provide this brief historical tidbit and ask you to consider two questions.  First, on today's PGA Tour, if Tiger is tied for the lead going into the final day of a major and shoots a sixty-eight, let alone a sixty-six, like Nicklaus did, is he going to lose the tournament?  No chance.  In fact, he probably ends up winning by five because the rest of the idiots can't even break par on Sunday.  It's simply not going to happen.  And second, how much fun would it be to watch Brandt Snedeker or Steve Flesch, who shot a combined eleven over on Sunday, stand over that same three-footer that Watson had on eighteen after their playing partner just sank a fifty-footer?  You can replay the Snedeker video to get an idea of how it would have ended. 

One final question - after seeing Trevor Immelman's wife, I have to wonder: do all these guys go to the same place to find their wives?

Trevor's Wife:

Tiger's Wife:

Phil's Wife: